


Not in That Way

by ThisIsMyTherapy



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Sam Smith Song, Eventual Smut, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Oblivious Derek Hale, Scent Kink, Slow Build, The Pack Knows, The Pack Ships It, discovery of feelings, most characters only mentioned, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-26 07:36:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16677340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisIsMyTherapy/pseuds/ThisIsMyTherapy
Summary: **My interpretation of Not in That Way by Sam SmithStiles kisses Derek impulsively and realizes his feelings for his friend.  Derek says he doesn't feel the same way, but he's an oblivious idiot.  With a little help from his sister, he realizes that he's been in love with Stiles for a long time.Sorry, I hate summaries and this is what happens when I listen to Pandora and every song relates to Sterek in some way!





	1. Chapter One

It happened so quickly Derek wasn’t sure if it was real.  He was sitting on the couch with Stiles like so many nights--cuddled on the couch watching a ridiculous show Stiles insisted on sharing.  He made a joke, Stiles laughed, that laugh that is almost punched out of him in surprise and then he laughs harder. Derek looked down to take it in and smiled back.  Then there were lips touching his, the briefest touch. And he would have said he imagined it if it weren’t for the panic radiating off of Stiles. Derek blinked. Blinked again and then again.  Slowly, trying to see if that would clear up what had just happened. 

 

Stiles was pushed all the way to the other side of the couch, panic, embarrassment, and something else clouding Derek’s senses.  He was speaking too…

 

“Oh god, Derek.  Derek, I am so sorry.  I don’t know why I did that,”  Stiles was saying. Derek just blinked.  

 

Stiles stood up and started pacing, hands running through his hair as he rambled, “I am so fucking sorry dude.  I have no idea what that was. Holy shit, I….I don’t even know what to say.” He stopped then, to finally look at Derek.  Derek blinked again.

 

“I..,” Derek started to say.  Clearing his throat, he tried again.  “I...care about you Stiles, a lot. Just…..not in that way.”

 

Stiles’ eyes widened before he smoothed his features and turned to grab his shoes.  “I have to go.”

 

“Stiles…,” Derek tried to get him to look at him, but Stiles mumbled, “I just need to go Derek,” before quickly leaving the loft, shoes in hand.

 

Derek continued to stare at his door trying to figure out what the hell just happened.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Five days.  It’s been five days since Stiles sorta kissed him and he hasn’t heard from him.  At.All. No texts with random thoughts, no teasing, no stories about what was happening down at the station.  No phone calls at 2am when he couldn’t sleep and he knew Derek would pick up and talk about nonsense until Stiles either fell asleep on the phone or Derek would tell him to go to bed.  No coming over just to “hang” or to annoy Derek with his casual assertion into his home. 

 

And the only reason he wasn’t worried he had been kidnapped was because the pack had mentioned seeing him, talking to him, or hanging out with him.  So it was definitely just Derek he was avoiding and it didn’t sit right with him. They were friends. They had been for a little over a year now and he missed it.  Derek missed Stiles. 

Tonight was Wednesday and the couples official “date night” and Derek and Stiles’ unofficial hang out night.  Every Wednesday as the couples went out Stiles would find his way over to Derek’s, if he wasn’t working a night shift, and they would binge watch random shows and eat way too much food.  

 

It was their  _ thing  _ and Derek didn’t think Stiles was going to show up.  And Derek didn’t know if he should check to see if he was coming.  

 

Derek was growing restless with the distance that had grown between him and Stiles.  They had finally gotten to a place where it was just  _ easy  _  to be around each other.  They joked and bantered back and forth with no real heat except for the few arguments they got in during pack meetings.  Derek enjoyed Stiles’ company whether they were watching shows, going for runs, researching, or sitting in silence--Derek reading while Stiles worked on a case.  

 

Derek considered Stiles his best friend.

 

And somehow he feels like he screwed it up.  

 

Turning his phone over in his hand, Derek let out a long breath before texting him.

 

**Derek: You coming by tonight?**

 

After staring at his phone for ten minutes and no reply, Derek threw his phone on the coffee table and decided to start dinner.  He made enough for two, just in case. 

 

Four hours later, Derek’s phone pinged with an incoming text.

 

**Stiles: Sorry man. Got roped into a double.**

 

Derek stared at the phone screen.  He could even tell when Stiles was lying through text.  He let it go, tossing his phone back on the table without replying.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Derek was agitated.  Unsettled.  _ Pissy,  _ as Cora was so kind to point out.  Another two days had passed with no real contact from Stiles and it was Pack Night.  He knew he would be seeing him later and it made him both anxious with excitement and anxious with dread.  Derek wasn’t so sure where they stood now. 

 

Keeping himself busy in the kitchen, Derek made snacks and started on dinner.  He could hear each pack member arrive. First Scott and Kira, then Lydia, followed by Mason and Corey, Liam and Hayden, then Theo, Isaac, and Danny.  Still no Stiles. 

 

It wasn’t odd for Stiles to be late, but more often than not he was showing up first in order to help Derek set everything up.  Derek focused on making more food, keeping one ear out for the rapid-fire heartbeat he knew so well.

 

“Hey, you Ok?” a voice came from behind him.  Derek jumped then cursed himself for it. Turning around, he found Kira looking at him with an amused grin.

 

“Fine,” Derek replied.  

 

“Hmm,” she nodded.  “You just seem a little….tense is all.  Need any help?” Kira asked.. Her amused smile turning into thinly masked concern.

 

Derek smiled, “I’m Ok really.  Go intercept the boys from picking Fight Club again.”  

 

Kira groaned, turning to do just that.  Derek let out a sigh before turning back to meat and veggie pinwheels he was rolling.  He was so focused on his task he almost missed the sound of Stiles’ heartbeat coming up the elevator.  

 

Derek held in a breath.  He decided earlier to take his cues from Stiles and go from there.  He listened as Stiles entered the loft and everyone cheered. He laughed his shy, self-deprecating laugh and mumbled something Derek couldn’t catch.   

 

He waited for Stiles to come into the kitchen to greet him.  Derek listened as he went from pack member to pack member, but he never made his way into the kitchen.  Never even asked where he was. So he took him time making the snacks. Announcing softly as each dish was finished so someone could come grab it.

 

Kira grabbed the pinwheels, Lydia the drinks, Isaac the chips and dip, Liam came for the nachos, and Corey came for the potato skins.  Derek continued to clean and check on the main course. The more time passed, the more upset he got. 

 

It wasn’t like Stiles to ignore him.  He would yell, push, rant, but never ignore and it hurt more than anything.  And what bothered Derek the most is the fact that he wanted to fix it, but didn’t know what he had done wrong in the first place.  

 

“Hey,” Cora said softly from behind him.  He grunted his response. “Did you and Stiles have a fight?”  She whispered.

 

Derek turned to her and shrugged.  Cora let out a long sigh and mirrored her brother, leaning against the counter, arms crossed over chest.  “What happened Der?” She asked again, so soft that Derek barely heard her. Derek didn’t know how to answer so he just shrugged again.

 

Cora shook her head, “Just….can you fix it?  We can all feel the tension and it’s making the pack tense.”  

 

Derek hung his head and scrubbed at his face, “Yeah…..I’ll try Cora,” Derek said softly.  Cora pulled her brother in for a hug and squeezed, rubbing her cheek to her big brothers. 

 

The timer went off, indicating dinner was done.  Pulling away, Derek placed a kiss on his sister’s head.  “Set the table for me?” Cora gave a soft smile and nodded.  

 

Derek took his time setting out the food.  He could feel Stiles watching him, but he never said anything.  The pack was quiet, more subdued, noticing the tension between them as they made their plates.  Derek opted to sit on the floor at Cora’s feet instead of his usual spot by Stiles. Derek ignored the looks the pack exchanged.

 

As soon as Derek finished his plate he was up and collecting everyone else’s for an excuse to be away from Stiles.  He wanted to scent him so badly, realizing that he couldn’t smell himself on him anymore. 

 

Lost in his own world, he didn’t notice the pack slowly leaving and whispering their goodbyes.  Derek finally walked out of the kitchen to see Stiles and Scott by the door whispering. Stiles flailed and Scott pushed him a little further into the room and said, “fix it,” before turning and sliding the door in Stiles’ face.  

 

Stiles let out a frustrated groan and pulled at his hair.  Derek stood frozen, waiting for him to say something. Finally, he turned and locked eyes with Derek.

 

“I’m sorry,” Stiles rushed out at the same time Derek said, “what did I do?”  Derek watched as Stiles’ face fell. “Nothing Derek…..shit, you didn’t do anything.”  Stiles told him while rubbing the back of his neck.

 

“Then why are you avoiding me?”  Derek asked, not recognizing his own voice.  He sounded young, vulnerable, and he hated it.  Stiles started towards him and then stopped abruptly.  Rubbing his face with his hands he let out a curse before pacing.

 

“Derek, you didn’t do anything I swear.  This is all on me.” Derek watched Stiles pace and waited for him to continue.

 

“The other day….I didn’t.  I don’t. Ehh….I didn't mean to kiss you Ok.  It just happened and I have no idea what possessed me to do it. It’s not like I have been pinning for you or anything.  You are one of my best friends Ok, I haven’t been harboring these feelings for you. Or at least I hadn’t realized I had.”  Stiles whispered that last part and stopped in his pacing. Derek watched stunned at hearing that revelation.

 

Stiles shook his head and began pacing again.  “After I left, I started thinking about it you know?  I asked myself why I did it. I wondered why, if I didn’t have feelings for you, why did it feel like you punched me in the gut when you said you didn’t feel the same way?  Because Derek, I didn’t even know I felt that way. I was confused and began going over these last few years and you know what I figured out?” Stiles stopped then and looked at Derek for the first time since he started his rant.  Derek swallowed and shook his head, not able to speak.

 

Not breaking eye contact Stiles told him, “I have been slowly falling in love with you since Mexico.”  Derek couldn’t breath. Stiles kept going. “It was so subtle, so slow that I didn’t even notice. But watching you die, watching you walk away, it broke something that I didn’t know you had been slowly fixing since you came back.  And I didn’t fully realize it until you said you didn’t feel the same way. In the same breath I realized I loved you and that I could never have you like that and I just…..I couldn’t deal Derek.” Derek watched as a single tear fell from his eye. 

 

Derek wanted to reach for him, but remained rooted to the floor.  Stiles wiped his eyes and stared at the floor. “You know I like to ignore problems hoping they go away.  But you aren’t a problem and I don’t want you to go away.” Stiles looked up at him then. “ I just needed some time….to figure out how to deal with all these new emotions and be around you knowing what I know now.”  Stiles gave him a small smile, “Of course I haven’t handled it well and I’m sorry I hurt you Der, I really am. I just…...I need to figure this out.”

 

Derek finally found his words, “what can I do?”  Because that’s all that Derek wanted to know. How does he fix it.  How can he make Stiles not  _ hurt.  _ Stiles smiled again, “There’s nothing you can do except give me some time to deal with this.  And know that you have done nothing wrong Derek.” Stiles’ voice was firm with that last statement and he was staring at him.  

 

“You are the best person I know OK?  You didn’t do anything wrong. This is not your fault.  I need you to know that.” Derek only nodded. “No Derek, tell me you get that.  Tell me you understand.” 

 

Derek let out a long breath, “I understand Stiles, I just…..,” Derek trailed off, trying to find the right words.  It's not like he didn’t love Stiles. He did, but he’s never thought of him past being his best friend...his anchor.  Yes, Stiles is attractive and Derek has no qualms about being with guys, it’s just….Stiles. 

 

“You just want to fix it,” Stiles answered for him with a small smile.

 

“Yeah,” Derek breathed out.  “You ‘re my best friend Stiles and I don’t like this….this distance.  I just want it to go back to how we were.” Derek confessed.

 

Stiles’ smile turned sad.  “God Der, I wish it could. I really do, I just…..need some time Ok?  Just give me a little more time and we can get back to being what we were.”

 

Derek just barely stopped the whimper that threatened to escape--instead he nodded.  Stiles nodded back and turned to leave. Derek’s wolf went crazy. He didn’t smell like Derek anymore and it was driving him crazy.

 

“Stiles!”  Derek nearly yelled sounding panicked.  He winced as he watched Stiles turn back to him with wide eyes.  “Can I…,” Derek trailed off, raising his hand to try to convey what he wanted.  Stiles’ face scrunched in confusion. “You don’t smell like me. I mean, you smell like pack, but not like me and I just….can I?”  Derek trailed off lamely.

 

Stiles nodded and held himself rigid.  Derek approached him like he would a caged animal.  Finally reaching him, Derek raised his hand to cup the back of Stiles’ neck and moved to his throat.  Stiles automatically raised his chin and pulled his head to the side. Derek couldn’t help the rumble that escaped him as he took in a long breath through his nose, inhaling Stiles’ scent.  Derek tried to ignore the way Stiles’ pulse started to beat faster, the way his breath hitched as Derek rubbed his cheek to his cheek. He also tried to ignore the way his own pulse sped up and the almost growl that tried to escape.  

 

Derek finally leaned back and took in a long breath, pleased when he could smell himself on Stiles.  “Thank you,” Derek told him almost shy. Stiles didn’t speak, just gave a sharp nod before turning to leave.  

 

Derek watched him leave and wondered if the pang he felt was more than what he cared to realize.

 


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek figures some things out.

Derek woke up only feeling slightly better about him and Stiles.  He replayed everything Stiles had confessed the night before and it only left him more confused.  Stiles was in love with him. And it made Derek feel…..he didn’t even know. Scrubbing his face, he got out of bed and made his way to the kitchen where he could smell the freshly brewed coffee.  

 

“Morning brother,” Cora greeted.  He grunted his response. Silence fell long enough for Derek to make his cup of coffee and sit down on the stool next to his sister.  One sip in and Cora was talking again. “So, did you fix it?” Derek didn’t feel like answering so he just took another sip of his coffee.

 

“Oh come on Der.  What happened? Lover’s quarrel?”  Cora teased. Derek choked on his next sip and growled.  

 

“Whoa, Ok, a little too close to home, sorry.”  Cora said sounding not at all sorry. Silence stretched again, but not for long.  Gentler, Cora asked, “seriously Der. What happened?” Derek let out a long sigh before deciding to tell her.

 

“He kissed me,”  Derek responded.

 

“Okaayyy…..,” Cora said scrunching up her nose.  Derek gaped at her. 

 

“Cora.  Stiles kissed me and then freaked out because he realized he’s in love with me and I told him I didn’t feel the same way,”  Derek explained, waiting for the shock to form. It did, but not in the way Derek had expected.

 

“Wait what?!?” Cora yelled making Derek flinch.  “What the hell Derek? Why would you tell him that?”

 

Derek gaped.  “What?” Derek asked confused.  Cora let out a frustrated breath before standing so she could stare at her brother, hands on her hips.  “Ok…..let me get this straight. You and Stiles aren’t dating?” She asked.

 

“What? No! Why would you think that?” Derek asked confused.  Cora laughed. And laughed. And laughed some more. “Cora,” Derek growled.  

 

“Ok...ok...give me a minute,” Cora wheezed.  Derek was not impressed. 

 

“Holy shit Der.  This whole time we all thought you and Stiles were dating and just didn’t want to tell us yet,” Cora explained.  Derek just gaped at her. “Oh my god Der. You are an absolute idiot. You really have no idea.” Cora shook her head at him amused.  Derek was not.

 

Cora continued, “Ok.  Let me break it down for you brother.  You have been wolf-courting Stiles for  _ months  _ and the pack just thought you guys would officially tell us when you were ready.”

 

“Wolf-courting? What the hell Cora?”  Derek all but yelled, getting more frustrated with his sister.  

 

Realizing her brother’s frustration, she dialed back the amusement and tried for a more gentle approach.  “Ok, sorry Derek. Let me just tell you what we see Ok?” Cora said as she lowered herself back down on the stool.  Derek turned to face her head on and nodded.

 

“You and Stiles have always had this energy towards each other.  At first it was this antagonistic pull, almost like you guys were playing a game of who could push the other the furthest.  At first it seemed like something we would do to each other, but I began to notice that it was so much more than that. It was almost like you two couldn’t communicate any other way.  But that began to change and we’ve all noticed.” Cora stopped to check in with Derek. He nodded for her to continue.

 

“You two are both self-sacrificing dickheads and it’s no wonder that you put yourselves in danger for us, but more often than not if it came down to sacrificing yourself for Stiles or vice versa it was never a second thought.  After a battle or some supernatural situation you always check on Stiles first.” Derek opened his mouth to defend himself, but Cora held up her hand. “It’s not because he’s human. You need to know where he is at all times and the first thing you ask when all is said and done is…,”

 

“Where’s Stiles,” Derek answered for her.  She smiled and continued. “Exactly. You have to be the strongest scent on him.  Any time someone scents him you come back and cover over their scent. You even do it after his dad hugs him.”  This made Derek blush because he knows its true, he’s caught himself, but hasn’t been able to stop.

 

“He’s pack,” Derek protested weakly.  Cora rolled her eyes and continued to point out the little things that Derek does for Stiles.  “You always prepare a plate for him first, you keep all his favorite foods stocked and threaten us if we even think about eating any.  You fix his car without him asking, keep clothes here for when he sleeps over, and don’t even think we haven’t noticed that most of the time the clothes are  _ yours. _ ”  Derek’s neck turned hot.  

 

Cora pushed on, “you gravitate to him wherever we are, no matter the occasion.  You are constantly taking in his scent and fucking  _ smirk  _ when you realize he smells like you.  We catch you looking at him sometimes and you have this look Derek.  Like there is no one more important in the whole universe.” Cora took a sip of her coffee before she said her last piece.  Lowering her voice she said, “you always make sure you are home on the anniversary of his mother’s death so he can come to you.  Because he always does. And on the anniversary….he shows up to keep you company all day and you hold him all night long as if you are scared you may lose him too.”

 

Cora wouldn’t meet his eyes and he was glad for it.  A single tear ran down his cheek and he blinked to make sure no more fell.  Clearing his throat he whispered, “he’s pack,” like that was his excuse for all of his actions.  He didn’t even realize he was doing half of that. 

 

Cora looked up at him and smiled, “Yeah, he’s pack, family.  And you are so good to us Derek. But that’s not how you treat your family, that’s how you treat the one you love.”   Derek sucked in a breath and held it. His heart was racing and his head pounding. Realizing he was about to bolt Cora reached out her hand and held his arm firmly.

 

“Look, I know this was a lot and I’m not telling you this so you get with Stiles.  Even though it’s clear to everyone that you two are fucking perfect for each other, this is up to you Der.  I just want you to be happy.” Derek nodded and stood. Leaning forward he kissed his sister on the temple and whispered his thanks.

 

Derek took the stairs two at a time, changed into running gear and was out the front door before Cora had even had time to wash the cups.  He ran. He ran through the forest and hoped it would help clear his clouded mind and aching heart.

 

~~~~~~~~~

It’s been two weeks since Derek ran out on his sister.  Two weeks of Stiles trying to be around Derek and not making it awkward.  20,160 minutes Derek has spent analyzing everything Cora had told him and thinking about his reactions to Stiles as they try to get back to where they were.  And he’s realized that he is a complete idiot. That he his, and has been for a very long time, completely in love with his best friend.

 

In his defense, it is exactly as Stiles said it was.  Subtle and slow and unnoticed by each of them. Derek may be an adult, but friendships and a pack created instead of made by family is new to him.  The only other person he truly loved was Paige and that….that was different than how he felt for Stiles. So Derek has decided it was not his fault that he reacted the way he did to Stiles kissing him.  He didn’t  _ know.   _ But now that he does, he doesn’t know what to do.

 

How does he approach Stiles now?  What does he say? Oh hey best friend, remember when I said ‘not in that way’?  Well, I’m a liar and I am so in love with you it fucking  _ hurts.   _ Let’s make this official?  Yeah, no. Understanding and accepting his feelings was so less terrifying than actually expressing them.  Even knowing that Stiles feels the same way does not soothe the panic Derek feels every time he thinks about talking to Stiles.

 

So he tries, like Stiles is, to make things not awkward.  They hang out a few times, but usually with someone else around.  They ignore the odd looks the pack gives them and forced smiles that don’t quite reach their eyes or the way Stiles will sometimes tense up before relaxing when Derek tries to scent him.  And it’s slowly killing him.

 

Tonight, they are all going out for Liam’s birthday.  It’s been planned for months, but Derek is just not in the mood.  

 

“Suck it up Derek.  You’re going,” Lydia told him from Cora’s room.  Groaning, Derek changed into the outfit Lydia pulled from his closet and began to get dressed mumbling, “you aren’t the boss of me,” somewhat petulantly. 

 

Cora snorted and Lydia almost growled, “Keep telling yourself that.”  Derek growled back with little heat.

 

Once they were all ready, the three of them left to meet the rest of them at the club.  Derek was anxious, but figured he would just sit at the bar and drink beer while he kept an eye out on the pack.  

 

It was crowded, no more than usual, but still crowded. Derek looked around and sucked in a breath when he saw Stiles.  He was dressed like he normally is when they go out. Long sleeved black shirt that hugs his filled out torso and broad shoulders with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, tight skinny jeans, and signature converse.  He was breathtaking and Derek doesn’t know how he never noticed. 

 

He was laughing at something Mason said, mouth open, head thrown back and it made Derek instinctively lick his lips.  Clearing her throat, Cora pushed him from the side, making Derek move toward everyone. 

 

“Der!”  Stiles greeted him, going in for a quick hug before doing the same to Lydia and Cora.  He had already been drinking, Derek could smell it on him.

 

“Alright losers, lets do some shots and then take over the dance floor!” Lydia yelled.  The girls and Stiles cheered followed by less enthusiastic grunts from the men. After three rounds of shots, everyone made their way to the dance floor.  Stiles turned to him, eyebrows raised in question, but Derek just shook his head. Stiles nodded and turned back, being swallowed by the crowd.

 

Derek watched as the pack danced, laughed, and sang at the top of their lungs, but he always found his way back to Stiles.  For the most part he danced with the girls, but every now and then a guy would pull up behind him, put their hands on his hips and start dancing.  Stiles would oblige, but never let it get too far. It made Derek’s blood boil.

 

The more he watched Stiles with other people the more jealous he got.  He was digging his nails into his palm to stop himself from taking what he felt was his.  When that thought crossed his mind he stilled. What was different from all the other nights they had gone out together?  Was it because he had finally realized his feelings? Derek thought about it. And the answer almost slapped him in the face.  Every other time, Stiles would be sitting next to him. He would venture out to the pack, dance with only them, then come back and spend most of his time by his side.  This was the first that Stiles wasn’t with Derek and Derek hated it. 

 

He didn’t blame Stiles.  Derek isn’t brave enough to tell him how he feels and Stiles is doing what he said he would--try to make things go back to how they were.  Derek watched as Malia swung Stiles around over and over before he lost his balance and fell into Theo’s arms. Theo looked down at him and smirked.  Stiles smiled back. 

 

Before Derek knew what he was doing, he broke the bottle he was holding and stood to go rip Stiles away from Theo and yell “mine!”.  But before he could get more than a few feet he was being pulled back.

 

“Whoa cowboy!” Cora yelled as she moved Derek to face her.  

 

“Move Cora,” Derek growled.  

 

“No Derek.  You need to calm down,”  she growled back.

 

Derek snapped his human teeth at her and flashed his eyes.  She was not deterred. Flashing her eyes back she said firmly, “you can’t just go force your way over there without having talked to him first Derek.  This is Stiles. You have to do this right.”

 

He wanted to ignore her, but she was right.  Stiles deserved better. He deserved to  _ know  _ that Derek was in love with him, not just asserting his dominance out of jealousy.  

 

Derek deflated and turned to his sister, “I can’t be here.  I have to go.” Cora gave her brother a sympathetic smile and nodded her head.  Derek smiled back and left without a second glance toward Stiles.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love confessions and sexy times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told myself I wasn't going to end this in smut. I am a lying liar who lies. Enjoy <3

Derek didn’t go straight home.  He drove out to the Preserve, parked his car, and laid out on the hood for hours just staring up at the stars.  Laura and he used to do this in New York. When they couldn’t sleep they would drive hours outside of the city to where the sky was clear and they could see the stars.  It helped them clear their heads and feel like they weren’t slowly suffocating. 

 

Getting back into his car, Derek didn’t have any answers about what to do about Stiles.  He should tell him, wanted to tell him, but was scared. And maybe that’s why he never really thought about Stiles outside of friendship.  What he had with Stiles was good, real, and he didn’t want to ruin it by adding another layer. He hasn’t had the best luck with relationships and couldn’t live in a life where Stiles wasn’t a part of it.  

 

Derek parked the Camaro and made his way up to the loft.  He could hear a steady heartbeat, but assumed it was Cora.  He was not expecting to see a nervous Stiles sitting on his couch.  As the door slid open, Stiles stood up.

 

“Hey,”  Stiles greeted a little too loud.  Derek tried not to wince. Closing the door, he took in a breath.  He could smell strangers, and pack, Theo, and alcohol. Derek didn’t like it and it was hard for him to concentrate.

 

“Derek?”  Stiles questioned when Derek hadn’t turned around to face him.  

 

“What are you doing here Stiles?  Derek asked. His voice was gruff.  He could hear Stiles swallow before answering.  “Umm...I saw you leave and you looked upset. Cora said you needed to leave and I got worried.  I had her bring me here, but you weren’t here so I said I’d wait.”

 

Derek took in some breaths through his mouth before turning to Stiles.  When he did, Stiles asked him, “Are you OK?”

 

Derek opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again.  “Do you think you could take a shower?” Derek instantly regretted it when he saw Stiles’ face fall.  “It’s just….we haven’t been around each other a lot and all I can smell is other people and it’s making my wolf a little anxious,” Derek rushed to explain.

 

Stiles nodded slowly, his face smoothed out only a little.  “Yeah, sure, totally,” Stiles answered as he moved to the bathroom only to come back out and go to the drawer that held his spare clothes.  Holy fuck, he had his own  _ drawer.   _ Derek really is an idiot.  

 

Scrubbing his hands down his face, Derek decided to take a shower too.  Climbing the stairs, he moved to his bathroom and took the time to figure out what he wanted to say to Stiles.  Derek wasn’t good with words and he wanted to get this right. 

 

When Derek finally made his way downstairs, Stiles was coming out of the kitchen with two mugs of coffee.  Silently, they moved to the couch at the same time, Derek taking the proffered cup and sitting down. 

 

Silence fell between them.  It wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t the comfortable silence they had grown accustomed too.  Finally, Stiles spoke, “will you tell me what made you so upset tonight?” 

 

Derek set down his cup and let out a deep breath.  He took several seconds to try and tell Stiles how he felt.  Finally, he settled on, “I was wondering if you would try it again.”

 

“What?”  Stiles asked confused.  He put his own cup down and turned to face the wolf.  Derek mirrored his actions. Derek cleared his throat, “the kiss.  I was wondering….if you would be willing to try again?”

 

Stiles’ heart jackhammered in his chest.  “Why?” he asked breathily.

 

Never breaking eye contact, Derek scooted a little closer before replying.  “Because I am an idiot and a liar.” Stiles’ breath caught, but it wasn’t enough.  He needed more and Derek was ready to give it to him.

 

With a soft smile Derek continued, “I didn’t know either.  At least, I was too blind to see that I have been falling in love with all along.  Like you said, it was subtle, but my god Stiles, it’s been right there this whole time and I…,”  Derek stopped what he was saying to reach out and catch the tear that was falling down Stiles’ cheek.

 

Derek used his thumb to wipe the tear and left his hand there, cupping Stiles’ face.  “I am so fucking in love with you and I was hoping you would kiss me again. I want to get it right this time.”  

 

Stiles searched his eyes frantically.  He must have found what he was looking for because he cleared his throat and sat up.  Leaning forward, Stiles cupped Derek’s face in his hands causing Derek to close his eyes instinctively.  He soon felt the light press of lips. It was chaste and sweet, and perfect. It just wasn’t quite enough.

 

Now that Derek knew how he felt, knew he could have this, it as like the flood gates opened.  Derek flicked his tongue out to press at the seams of Stiles’ lips causing him to gasp. Taking the opportunity, Derek pushed his tongue to meet Stiles’.  Stiles let out the most delicious moan and pushed his tongue forward, battling for dominance. 

 

They pushed and pulled at each other until Derek couldn’t take it anymore.  Pulling back, Derek gasped out Stiles’ name. “Yes,” came his response. Derek chuckled.  

 

“Stiles, I want….I need…,”  Derek tried to express what he wanted while Stiles placed kisses down his throat.  “Anything Derek. Everything. Fuck Derek, yes, yes, yes,” Stiles told him. Derek stood up, taking Stiles with him and crashed their mouths together.  Derek pushed him towards the stairs and just before they started climbing them Stiles jumped up, wrapping his legs around Derek’s waist knowing he would catch him.  He wasn’t wrong.

 

Derek carried them up the stairs, never breaking their frantic kissing until he was tossing Stiles on the bed.  Trying to steady his breathing, Derek took in the sight of Stiles laid out on his bed, legs spread, ready. “I don’t think I can take this slow Stiles, so tell me now.  What do you want?” Stiles sat up on his knees and walked forward until he was almost touching Derek.

 

“I want it all big guy.  I want you to strip me naked, open me up, and take me apart while you fill me up so fucking full.  Claim me Derek. I’m yours.” Derek growled and flashed his eyes, just barely keeping his claws from coming out.  

 

Derek moved fast to get rid of their clothes and had Stiles naked and panting in record time.  Derek leaned forward and licked Stiles from his collarbone to his ear. “Mine,” Derek growled. “Yours,” Stiles whimpered.  

 

Derek reached into his nightstand and pulled the lube out.  He was trying to calm down, but all he could think about was being inside Stiles.  He poured lube on his fingers and moved to tilt Stiles’s hips up for better access.  Locking eyes with Stiles, Derek slowly pushed his finger inside his tight pucker. Stiles threw back his head and moaned at the intrusion.  

 

Leaning forward, Derek claimed Stiles’ mouth as he pushed his finger all the way in.  Stiles moaned into the kiss and Derek worked him open. Adding another finger, Derek moved his kisses to Stiles’ throat reveling in the purple bruises that he left there.

 

“Fuck Derek, more, I need more,” Stiles panted out as he began to fuck himself on Derek’s fingers.  Derek growled and gave him what he asked for. Pushing a third finger inside Stiles, he changed the angle so he brushed his prostate.  

 

“Holy fuck!”  Stiles yelled, back bowing off the bed.  Derek looked down to see precome pooling at the tip of Stiles’ cock and had to taste him.  Bending down, Derek sucked the head of Stiles’ cock into his mouth. “Fuck Derek…...Derek stop.  Holy shit,” Stiles yelled, but Derek couldn’t get enough of his salty taste and sucked harder.

 

“Derek, if you don’t stop I’m going to come and I want to come with you inside me,  _ please _ ,” Stiles pleaded.  

 

Derek instantly pulled back and kissed Stiles on the mouth so he could taste himself on his tongue. Pulling back he said, “This is going to be fast and hard Stiles.  I’ll go slow next time.”

 

“Fuck yes, just hurry up,”  Stiles agreed. Derek pulled his fingers out and spilled more lube on his straining cock.  Derek took Stiles’ knees in his hands and placed them on his shoulders before lining himself up to Stiles’ now stretched hole.  Locking eyes with his love he pushed in slowly, but didn’t stop until he was fully seated. 

 

“Fucckk,” Stiles moaned out.  Derek stilled to try to give Stiles time to adjust, but all he wanted to do was pound him into the mattress and claim him as  _ his.   _ “Stiles,” Derek whimpered out.  “Yes, Derek, move, please fucking mo….ugh!”  

 

Derek pulled out and slammed back into Stiles before he could finish his sentence.  Leaning back, Derek took Stiles’ hips in his hands and began to thrust into him in an almost brutal pace.  All Stiles could get out were choked off approximations of “yes” “more” “please” and Derek’s name. Derek rolled his hips in a way that was pounding into Stiles’ prostate with every thrust.  

 

“Der...oh fuck...I’m gonna….I’m gonna come….,” Stiles choked out before his orgasm punched out of him.  Come spilled between them, shooting out to cover their chests and stomachs. Derek sped up his thrusts, growling at the sensation of Stiles’ channel squeezing him.  Leaning forward Derek growled out an “I love you”, before biting down on the flesh where shoulder meets neck and spilling his seed into Stiles’ ass. 

 

Derek finally released Stiles’ flesh and dropped down beside him, instantly pulling him to his chest.  Stiles was still trying to catch his breath when Derek took in a lungful of air and could only smell him and Stiles.  Letting out a pleased rumble, he buried his face in the crook of his neck.

 

Stiles chuckled, “oh god, you really are a scent slut.”  Derek gave a pleased growl and mumbled, “only with you.” Stiles laughed again.  “Good,” he said.

 

After a few more minutes, Derek got up and reluctantly cleaned themselves up.  Stiles was still saturated in his scent, but Derek would have loved to have Stiles stained in his come.  

 

“Are you pouting?”  Stiles laughed out. Derek glared at him.  “Oh my god, you totally are.” Stiles laughed harder.  

 

Derek didn’t respond, just threw the dirty cloth towards the dirty clothes basket and maneuvered Stiles how he wanted him.  He didn’t even care that he buried his nose in the crock of his neck so he could breathe the scent of them in. It was intoxicating.  

 

They laid there, Derek with his nose buried in Stiles’ neck and Stiles running his fingers up and down Derek’s arm soothingly.

 

“Hey Der?”  Stiles whispered.

 

Derek could only grunt causing Stiles to laugh.

 

“I really fucking love you,” he said with so much conviction Derek sat up to look him in the eyes.

 

“I really fucking love you too,” Derek told him with just was much conviction.  

 

The smile he got in return was something Derek would spend his whole life trying to recreate.

 


End file.
